Who's on Base?

Characters:

• Dave: The one who explains the mission.
• Zaph: The confused one.
• Myles: The even more confused one.
• Craig: The utterly bewildered one.

EXT. FORTRESS BASE - DAY

Dave: Alright team, listen up. Our mission is to defend this fort... well, it's more like a base.

Myles: A fort or a base, Dave?

Dave: It’s a base-fort. We need to defend it.

Craig: Defend it from what?

Dave: The bugs. Now, there's the front door... or, wait, there are two front doors.

Craig: Two front doors?

Dave: Yes, and a back door. No, wait, two back doors.

Myles: Two front doors and two back doors?

Dave: Right, and there's also a middle door.

Craig: How many doors does this place have?

Dave: All the doors can be opened and closed with a switch near the door.

Zaph: What does the switch look like?

Dave: It’s... uh, near the door.

Myles: Do the doors start open or closed?

Dave: Oh, and there's a generator in the base. If the bugs destroy it, we lose.

Myles: Where’s the generator?

Zaph: What does it look like?

Dave: It's a generator. And there are drop ships launching from somewhere.

Myles: Where do they launch from?

Dave: We need to hold the base until eight ships have launched to win.

Zaph: Eight ships, got it.

Dave: Oh, and we also need to get to the evac point and catch a drop ship off the planet.

Zaph: Where's the evac point?

Dave: It's somewhere. Now, it’s best not to close all the doors, or the bugs will just smash them.

Myles: Are the bugs spawning from inside or outside the base?

Craig: Is the base a circle with an inner area, or do the bugs come through the back door and front door?

Dave: Myles, why did you pick the landing zone outside the base?

Myles: That’s where your cursor was pointing.

Dave: Well, we're going to have to quick march into the base before the bugs start pouring in.

Craig: This is confusing.

Zaph: I thought we were defending the base.

Craig: With how many doors again?

Dave: Exactly!

Zaph: And if we don't?

Dave: We die.

Myles: And if we make it?

Dave: You might still die.

Craig: Great. So, what's the plan?

Dave: Defend the base.

Myles: With five doors.

Dave: Correct.

Zaph: And save the generator.

Dave: Absolutely.

Craig: And get to the evac point.

Dave: Precisely.

Myles: This is going to be a disaster.

Dave: It already is.

Narrator: They died many times. Only four drop ships escaped, and only two of them made it to the evac drop ship.